Come to My Pity Party!
Come to My Pity Party! Have you ever had those days where you sit there and feel sorry for yourself? You complain about how life isn’t fair, nothing ever goes your way, why me, I never win. Well, this is kind of what my Thursday sounded like in my head and conversation with God. This past week I experienced something that made me realize how blessed I am and how things could be worst. Are you feeling sorry for yourself? Come to My Pity Party and find out what happened to make me turn it into a Celebration of Life Party. It was a humbling experience that brought me to tears.
Feeling Sorry For Myself
Have you ever had one of those days or weeks where you just have a pity party? You know those days where you feel nothing is going right? You have done everything in your power to change things and you realize that things are still the same. You realize that you are facing this season in your life and nothing is going to change at that moment. Well, that was the kind of day I was having on Thursday.
I had a talk with God and explained how I felt and how I wish things were different. I went to bed feeling in the dumps. Furthermore, I didn’t have a good week as far as my eating or exercise regimen. It was evident when I hopped on the scale and so that made it even worst.
It’s Low
After the birth of my 6 year old daughter, my iron levels dropped dramatically. The doctors told me to take iron supplements and my levels still didn’t increase. When I was pregnant with my 3 year old daughter, my levels dropped even further and my doctor decided to try liquid iron.
Although it increased my levels somewhat, it didn’t solve my problem. Throughout the years my levels have dropped to the point that I am now borderline anemic. My doctors have tried everything possible and so the final solution has been to have an Iron IV. This normally does the trick and so my doctor ordered for me to have an Iron IV Infusion.
Reality Check
The day after my pity party, I went to get my Iron IV and I had a BIG REALITY CHECK. I was really excited about getting the IV, but I didn’t realize where I would be going to get this procedure done. As I drove into the parking lot, I realized I was going to a Cancer Center.
As I entered the office, my eyes filled with tears as I looked around me and saw people with masks, wigs, IV’s, breathing machines, and looks of hopelessness on their face. Their loved ones were sitting next to them with the same look of hopelessness on their face. It was heart breaking.
Chemotherapy Room
The IV was scheduled for 1 pm. in the Chemotherapy Room. I was so scared to go into that room as I didn’t know what to expect. As I walked in I saw a room filled with over 50 chairs. My heart broke into millions of pieces. The nurse told me where to go and as I walked by I saw people getting their chemotherapy. Some were smiling and some had a look of exhaustion and defeat.
My problems seemed so insignificant compared to what people in this room were facing. These people were fighting for one more day of life. They were fighting to beat cancer. How dare I complain about everyday living when nothing I was going through compared to what these individuals were facing?
I wasn’t fighting to live. I wasn’t wondering how much longer I had to live. I was simply dealing with everyday life and was being a big cry baby about it. I have my health, my beautiful children, my wonderful husband! How dare I complain about anything?
God Spoke To Me
I truly believe that God speaks to us in different ways. Sometimes He speaks to our heart silently and sometimes it is very loud and clear. God did both that day. Before my appointment, I ran into a video on You Tube that really spoke to me. I knew at that moment that God was lovingly reminding me of HIS PROVISION.
He has never abandoned us. He may not answer on our time table, but He is never late. The video I saw was that of a Christian Singer who is fighting cancer himself. The words of one of his new songs really stuck in my head.
Look Back: Thank Him , Look Forward: Trust Him, Look Around: Serve Him, Look Up: He’s all I need.
I was quickly reminded of God’s faithfulness. As I look back, I thank Him for His provision in the most difficult of times. As I look forward, I trust Him to know that even though I don’t see the answer right now He truly has my best interest at heart. As I look around I serve Him by reaching out to others and as I look up I TRULY realize He is all I need.
My Pity Party Quickly Became a Celebration of Life Party!
What Can You Celebrate Today?
Leave a Comment Below
Monica,
I just now saw this post, after reading today’s one about your infusion and trying to find out what that was. I am so glad that I read this one. This will be my first Valentine’s Day after my divorce (his idea!) and it would be easy to let the rejection get to me. Thank you for the reminder of all of my blessings and God’s provisions, and His great love for me. And I even have a wonderful sister-in-law (actually ex legally) and one of her sisters that sent me a Valentine package. So sweet!
A song that I really clung to was Jason Gray, Nothing is Wasted: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvnBhtbATag
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/jasongray/nothingiswasted.html
I tried to find the song you mentioned, but couldn’t find it. Do you still have the youtube or know the artist’s name and/or name of the song?
Thanks and God bless,
Bonnie
Wow, Monica, thank you for sharing this story with us. ♥ So many times I have felt the way you are feeling. It’s easy to look at where we are and feel sorry for ourselves. (guilty) But when I look around at what others are facing I am always humbled by how richly my life has been blessed.
I’m thankful that my dad is kicking cancer’s but! I’m thankful that my grandma is still alive. I’m thankful for the two children God has blessed me with and allowed me to mother. I’m thankful that I have a husband I both love and respect. I’m thankful for doors that are being opened for me. I’m thankful for my friends, church family, and so much more.
Today especially I am thankful for you and this post which will help me to focus outward on others instead of inward on my own pity party. {hugs}
I hope you are feeling better physically. It is obvious that you are feeling better emotionally and spiritually, and I am so happy for you. I believe in the God of the Bible, and I believe that all his promises will come true. When I focus on his purposes, and all that he has already done, there is no way to be on the pity pot! But, not all people know the truth of the Bible, and I think that is why some have no hope. Therefore, I can understand how they can easily get on the pity pot. This world offers no real hope. The only hope is what Jesus told us to pray for at Matthew chapter 6, verse:10. What a day that will be. Be well Monica, and thank you for all you share.
Monica, Thank you for sharing this. Like many of the other comments, it was exactly what I needed to see today. I, too, had a very bad day last Thursday. I lost my job of 30+ years last Thursday, and now I face an uncertain future. But, thankfully, like you, I know Who holds that future, and I trust Him to see me through. My strength comes from the Lord.
This is truly beautiful and inspiring !! I believe everyone , all if us have these moments . It is hard at times to stop feeling sorry , and stop and truly count our blessings ! Each day is a gift from God and we are here for a reason . I am so happy I came across your post it is encouraging and touched my heart !! Sending hugs your way !
Mayra
I know how you felt I felt the same way when I walked into a Cancer Center for my iron infusion. I thought “do I have cancer and they aren’t telling me”. That was 2 years ago May. I had the Infusions every week for the first year and only 3 this past year. Things do work out
Thank you for sharing your experience. God is always faithful but sometimes we have to be reminded. Last week was particulary hard for me because Wednesday was the six month anniversary since my Dad passed away. It feels like it was just yesterday and I worry about my 82 year old Mother who is struggling with being alone after nearly 65 years of marriage. I had my own medical issues to deal with last week and it all seemed too much. I just want to curl up and cry. Yesterday I read a story about a lost much loved dog. This dog was lost in the woods for sixty days but the Mother and daughter who loved the dog never gave up. God blessed their continued commitment of bringing food to the area where the dog was every day by bringing the dog home. As I read the story I cried for so many things but at the end I was crying for God’s love and mercy. Reading your experience reminds me yet again to be thankful in all things. I still miss my Dad terribly and I know that pain will take time to heal but I also know my Heavenly Father is carrying me through every day. Thank you for sharing so honestly Monica. May you feel surrounded by God’s perfect peace.
Sandi
Amiga, lo que tenemos que celebrar siempre es privilegio de vivir. Lo demas lo arreglamos por el camino, pero tu, yo y todos los demas debemos agradecer a Dios por cada segundo que respiramos. Un abrazo y recuerda siempre que no estas sola, que en Miami te espero con los brazos abiertos y que mi telefono no tienes minutos limitados. I love you!!!!
We are all humans living in a fallen world. I’m grateful that there was something that cold improve your quality of life. I’m celebrTing the fact that God is in control. Woop Whoop!
Hi, Monica~
Your post reminds me that no matter what troubles we are going through, there are many people who are facing much harder battles.
I have been in the depths of depression for the past couple of months. Many things have happened to cause this, including the death of my beloved father, and being without my meds for a month.
What I can celevrate is the fact that Spring is finally around the corner. I will be able to get out of this house and play in the flower gardens all day long. I can hardly wait!
Thank you~
Judi
I life there are moments where words can’t begin to describe the feelings inside. Reading this just made me cry, and thank God for my blessings today.
Thank you for the post.
WOW! Monica thank you so much for sharing this. I needed to read this today! I am so thankful for God’s faithfulness! ♥